Better late than never

       Many birthdays, funerals, events of my life and changes have happened since I had last posted.  I still have the stiffness and aches of Rheumatoid Arthritis which will be with me until my last breath.  Luckily,  I have a great  Rheumatologist who is very happy with my results and where I am today versus where I was in 2007 at my first diagnosis.  I still have a wonderful support system of God, friends, family and the all mighty Internet!
     The daily living of my life is now wanting me to write, type and say what is on my mind.  With the advancement of picture phones causes me to react to what I see,  most of the time beautiful visions and sometimes,  it pauses me to question.
      This year, turning 50 was uneventful and with little celebration.  Not wanting the "hoopla" that goes along with a unique event was my choice.   Doc Stevens, my Rheumatologist,  has been consistent in mixing and tweaking my medicinal cocktail of Methotrexate, Prednisone and Folic Acid.  In addition to that,  I was on Humira for approximately one year and self-injecting my poor thigh every two weeks with this hugely expensive liquid gold that would take away the inflammation that has turned against me waging a horrific war on my joints and bones.  Friends thought I was heroic to subject myself to that torture when in reality,  I did not want to sit in an office for three hours on an I.V. every week  listening to other patients and their talk of combat with this dreadful disease.  Call me selfish,  uncaring and self-centered.  I was battling my own depressing feelings of fright, fear, loneliness and heaviness that weighted me down.    
     My Rheumatologist seems to think my disease is in remission but can rear its ugly head at any time.  I do thank Heavenly Father along with my dilligance to take my medication to help me along for as long as I can.

Medication

lowering of my prednisone by half a tablet this week. So far I am at one and a half tablets of prednisone at 5 MG, one folic acid tablet at 1 MG and 1 multi vitamin, daily. I take four methotrexate tablets at 10 MG every Wednesday and the Humira injection every two weeks, all of which I have faithfully taken and not missed for fear of my stiffening joints coming back to haunt me. The weather certainly doesn't play any part in it's affect on my joints as I so often hear from other sufferers. I sometimes feel a fullness in my hand joints when I curl my fingers and I look for tell tale signs of nodules and deformities as my fingers stand at attention under my inspection. I am afraid of the medications in my ample embodiment of woman and I disengage from the thoughts of what the future holds for me. Four months ago, I was a wretch from my tormenting pain and surprised by the suddenness of it all. A misery I would not wish upon anyone and executed a disguise of my endurance. This disease was altering me so aggressively, that I was not recognizable to myself anymore. Where was that sturdy, vigorous, take-charge woman that I knew? The agony was excruciating. The loneliness was more inviting, yet, lacerating and extracted me from the human race. My advantage was my family and friends who kept in touch with me often with their talk of others with my affliction. I continued to help others in their time of need to keep me active in life since I was abruptly forced to stay home. In helping them, I helped myself heal and redirected my quality of health for the better.

Resolutions

I am not one for making resolutions because I am really good at breaking them, so I don't make them. I have changed my way of eating, hopefully, for the better. Since being home, I have been cooking more instead of take-out. Switching to more tea and water and laying off of the soda and junk food. My weakness is chips and chocolate and do find the time to sneak a few items into my diet for that. So far, my rheumatoid arthritis has generally improved. With the introduction of the Humira injection, my life has upgraded itself out of the stiffness category when I wake up in the morning. I am still on 2 prednisone/1folic acid/1 metaplex vitamin a day. Four methotrexate pills every Wednesday and the Humira shot is every other week. I'm thanking my lucky stars that I have not had any side affects from my medication. My certain markers or criteria that my RAtologist always looks for has significantly been reduced. I've gained back most of my weight from four months ago when I started my water and tea diet. I can still fit into my uniform, which I'm grateful for. I'm hoping that I can remember what I have to do at work and can fall in line with everyone else. That I will be strong enough to open airplane doors or tackle a terrorist should he get past me upon trying to audit me at the gates. To have the strength and spirit to accommodate the public should there be a melt down in weather situations and not be totally frazzled by the end of my day. I'm looking forward to seeing my co-workers and getting back into my working environment. Most of all, picking up enough hours without practically "killing" or exhausting myself to see a normal paycheck instead of the pittance that I've been receiving while on sick leave. I'm looking forward to the freedom of flying again as this time off has kept me road bound to the earth. The constant joy that I receive from my employment and my friends that keep me laughing in good and bad times. No resolutions, but I have an abundance of little things to be thankful for.
Happy New Years!

Reducing my medication....again

yes, now I'm down to half a table of prednisone every odd day until Dec 12Th when I go back to see my RAtologist for the third phase of my medication process. I've been very tired and it seems that my hands joints have been stiff in the morning when I wake up particularly my right hand. A few days ago, I favored my right leg and limped around for most of the day. It was terrible. I had visions of not too long ago when I couldn't even walk and had trouble getting out of bed. I couldn't even roll over and my hands were very swollen as was my ankles and knees. I don't want to relive that again. Going from a strong woman who could throw 7o pound bags around was no problem and now, I couldn't even open a jar of peanut butter! Here is my medication this week:
half tablet of prednisone - every odd day/5mg
4 tablet of methotrexate - every Wed/2.5mg
1 tablet of folic acid/1mg
1 tablet of Hema-Plex multi nutrient vitamin.