Happy Mother's Day

as I spend a nice quiet weekend at my favorite Las Vegas Hotel, The Rio. The thought about spending three days alone and by myself is selfish but much needed in my family life of chaos and work. Three days without someone by my side to talk to or have lunch with or to lay out by the pool is selfish, but how many of us can say that or have that kind of time or would want to purposely venture on alone? Not many and yet many of us do. I am connected with my laptop and cell phone yet the urge and necessity for human contact is first and foremost. I regal in my solitude and still feel the pang of loneliness but the thought of my flying back home to unorganized chaos is overwhelming and I sit back in the comfort of my lounge chair in the warmth of the sun hearing sounds of the waterfalls and children playing in the background.
My son's birthday is today as he turns 15 years old. A handsome young man, dark features, clean cut, tall, lanky and built, obvious from his workout with free weights. His voice deeper as he ages, is my heart and soul. I wonder about his future and hope that he has the strength to carry him though his life journey of human trial and tribulations. I hope that I am a good enough role model for him as his mother and sometimes father.
As I drift off to sleep, I think good thoughts and try not to worry about the negatives in my life and focus more on the positive. I thank God that I am able to rise up from my bed in the morning, to open my eyes and take a deep breath and put my two feet on the floor to stand up and take the first steps in my day. I am very thankful for that.

Mortgage meltdown

I have been in talks on the phone with my mortgage lenders as my monthly payments have been overwhelming since I was on sick leave for four months and not able to keep up with my mortgage. Foreclosure looms in the distance and I have done everything possible to keep from losing my home. Downey has received my packet information for a loan modification but it will take four to six weeks to process. In the meantime, I am to call back every week to check on the status of the packet and where I am in the process. There is no foreclosure date, yet. I am hoping that they will modify my loan to where I can pay a respectable amount a month and not some outrageous sum for the next year or two. I have made up my mind to try to sell my home and just be a renter. I am totally satisfied with that. I have retained my realtor who sold my father's home in Pacifica and found this nice house in Daly City complete with an in-law apartment downstairs. My oldest daughter, Nani, who rents from me has not paid me any rent and I have told her that I cannot support a 24 year old! I suggested that she go and live with her boyfriend, Sergio, who she has recently gotten back together with and has been seeing. I did catch him on my front door stoop trying to leave an overnight bag that she had forgotten and confronted him about her staying with him. Like any man, he made up excuses that he lives on his own and likes living by himself since his mother moved back to Central America. But he calls my daughter when he wants to spend time with her to stay overnight at his place. Well you know what, Sergio? Take her, the hell, with you! Then I wouldn't have to see your free loading butt in my house! I did tell my daughter that when we sell this house, I will be moving into a 2 bedroom apartment for my son and I only. She's welcome to stay with us, but it will out in the front living room. It is very hard to live in California to afford a home or apartment here. Adult children moving back in with their parents. Children don't want to help their parents out with much especially if the adult children's money is going to important things like, partying with their friends. They eat your food, use your laundry detergent and have no decency to respect your home. It's the "GEN-M's" Generation moochers! I'm only speaking on behalf of my daughter. There may be more out there like her but then again, I know that there are alot of other self respecting young adults who do have their crap together and know what it takes to make it out in the world. Some just take a little longer.