Words from a loving mom to her son.

It has been a week of letting go for me. My son left for Air Force Boot Camp last week and it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do besides give birth to him. Long talks, texting, phone calls, shopping for this, mail order that, pay for this, charge for that and leaving messages will all but come to a silent stop. Waiting with him in the boarding area before his flight left, I watched him and his movements. He listened to his Ipod that he bought the night before with his first ever credit card. My thoughts drifted back to when he was three, then seven, I remembered him looking up at me while playing with his firetruck that his grandfather bought him for Christmas and saying to him, "I'm going to miss you when you grow up". Puzzled, his attention turned back towards the firetruck. In recent years, I have whispered that verse over and over to him and now, it is the day and the time has come. At least for the next 8 weeks while he is away. His low manly voice breaks my train of thought, "Mom" he says, "when I call you don't say anything because my CO (Commanding Officer) will be on the other side listening to what I say to you, I only have 15 minutes to talk to you"! His speech will all be written in advance and if he deviate's from that, his CO will be ready to yell at him on the other end of the line. I'm thinking, "WTH", what Commander A** is listening into our conversation while I'm talking to my son??! That's a fricken invasion of our privacy! BUT, this is the Military and it's who my son now belongs to, lock, stock and barrel for the next 6 years. Not mama's son anymore but property of the Good 'ol USA. My son, Manny has been training since October 2012 for this. He has been preparing his young 19 year old body for the rigors of Military life and all that it encompasses. The discipline, preparation, drills, development, cultivation, motivation, sense of self worth and pride that he will soon come to know. I expect the Military to nourish him when he needs support, nurture him in grace, educate him when he does not know, foster his spirit when others won't, instruct his mind to further himself, train him in the manners unknown to him, polish the diamond within him, foster his character with strength and vitality, feed his soul with the word of Heavenly Father. With that you will receive: his loyalty that will command your honesty, his contract is your responsibility, his pledge is your obligation, his burden is your protection, his trust is your liability, his mission is your profession, his life is your accountability. Please, take care of him and his squadron while they help to protect our freedom and the privileges that come at such a high price. I love you always, son and am very proud of you! Thank you for being who you are. Mom

Remembering mom

Friday, December 28, 2007 This was written a few years ago and thought i'd share my memory of her: Remembering my mother as an awe-inspiring, beautiful and sometimes fearsome woman as I look back on my sweet memories of her spirit. She passed away on this day in the year 2003 on the island of Oahu with my son and daughter by her side, crying, stroking her hair and kissing her head wishing that she were still here with us and letting her know how well loved she was and will always be. I couldn't wait to whisk her away from the stark coldness of the hospital, invading steeliness of her unfamiliar platform on which she silently drifted off to infinite sleep and the inaudible, unfriendly environment of her confines. Waiting for her on the island of Molokai is the fresh fragrant scent of the lush verdant mountains, the trade winds tenderly anticipating her spirit and the warm gentle lull of the ocean waiting with open arms for my mother's arrival.Being the eldest, I was responsible to take care of her in a way that she has taken care of me all of my years. I had her cremated to be buried atop of her mother's grave on the island of Molokai. I was bringing her home. With my Uncle Ben carving an elaborate Urn made of the finest Hawaiian wood, she would be carried by the love of the families in this way to her birthplace. Friends and families gathered at the Mormon Church to wish her well and we drove the long red dusty road of Molokai to her final resting place. Gathering under the warmth of the hot sun and the tropical breeze bringing the scent of fresh Pikake and white Ginger flowers, scents that she loved, Bishop Keanini offered words of sympathy and strength to all in our own journey and to remember the life and times of my mother. With the braveness and soul of a ten year old, my son at that time asked me if he could lay his grandmother into the ground. I was speechless and offered an affirming nod of approval to him. With my daughter by my side holding me as if to keep me from falling, we watched as my son carefully picked his grandmother's urn up, walked steadily to her resting area and gently placed her into the belly of her mother. His small sullen face watching her as she was unhurriedly descending into her entombment and through his veins flowed her strength and life. She was proud of her grandson and granddaughters. As an offering, native flowers were buried with her to carry into her afterlife, the scent of her homeland. My cousin Lani strummed the ukulele and sang "Aloha Oe". Everyone sang in unison bidding farewell to a wonderful woman and mother. My memories are vivid today as if the event happened only a moment ago. The sun on my face, the tropical breeze dancing through my hair and the scent of flowers converged all around us making it a day to remember my mother. I think of her often around this time and the life that she has given me. I love you and miss you very much, mom.

Remembering my mother

as an awe-inspiring, beautiful and sometimes fearsome woman as I look back on my sweet memories of her spirit. She passed away on this day in the year 2003 on the island of Oahu with my son and daughter by her side, crying, stroking her hair and kissing her head wishing that she were still here with us and letting her know how well loved she was and will always be. I couldn't wait to whisk her away from the stark coldness of the hospital, invading steeliness of her unfamiliar platform on which she silently drifted off to infinite sleep and the inaudible, unfriendly environment of her confines. Waiting for her on the island of Molokai is the fresh fragrant scent of the lush verdant mountains, the trade winds tenderly anticipating her spirit and the warm gentle lull of the ocean waiting with open arms for my mother's arrival.
Being the eldest, I was responsible to take care of her in a way that she has taken care of me all of my years. I had her cremated to be buried atop of her mother's grave on the island of Molokai. I was bringing her home. With my Uncle Ben carving an elaborate Urn made of the finest Hawaiian wood, she would be carried by the love of the families in this way to her birthplace. Friends and families gathered at the Mormon Church to wish her well and we drove the long red dusty road of Molokai to her final resting place. Gathering under the warmth of the hot sun and the tropical breeze bringing the scent of fresh Pikake and white Ginger flowers, scents that she loved, Bishop Keanini offered words of sympathy and strength to all in our own journey and to remember the life and times of my mother. With the braveness and soul of a ten year old, my son at that time asked me if he could lay his grandmother into the ground. I was speechless and offered an affirming nod of approval to him. With my daughter by my side holding me as if to keep me from falling, we watched as my son carefully picked his grandmother's urn up, walked steadily to her resting area and gently placed her into the belly of her mother. His small sullen face watching her as she was unhurriedly descending into her entombment and through his veins flowed her strength and life. She was proud of her grandson and granddaughters. As an offering, native flowers were buried with her to carry into her afterlife, the scent of her homeland. My cousin Lani strummed the ukulele and sang "Aloha Oe". Everyone sang in unison bidding farewell to a wonderful woman and mother. My memories are vivid today as if the event happened only a moment ago. The sun on my face, the tropical breeze dancing through my hair and the scent of flowers converged all around us making it a day to remember my mother. I think of her often around this time and the life that she has given me. I love you and miss you very much, mom.